The art of the benign pattern interrupt

tricks are for kids

When I was a waiter, I learned that there were a few words I could utter to charm almost anyone. 

This is perhaps overstating it. It’s not like they fell in love with me or anything. But with a single phrase, I could open a social door. Immediately, they regarded me as a little more authentically human than a normal server, more of an ally, a potential chum.

The phrase was: “I’m going to get you some water.”

This is, granted, not spectacular copy, as written. It was all in the intonation and procedure. I had to say it in this slightly silly way. It was like: “I’m… going to get you some… water?” And it worked best if I combined it with a particular approach. I would come upon them wordlessly, allow them to make eye contact, and then let the eye contact persist for a moment that was almost too long before speaking.