If you’re a man on a dating site, and you’re not immensely photogenic, you should seek romance through other means immediately. It’s really hard to be attractive to women on dating sites, because dating sites are a terrible venue for male attractiveness.
Great post! There is a simple idea that sums all of this up quite nicely: it is easier for men to bring interlopers into a social circle than it is for women to do the same. So, it is the path of least resistance for women to date men who already have status within their social group.
We are a little hard-wired to view new men as a threat and new women as an opportunity. For example, there are a lot of countries where men can pass on citizenship to foreign-born wives, but women cannot.
Also, that OK Cupid data is revelatory. Could you imagine any internet/social media company publicly releasing that kind of data today? It really is an artifact of a specific moment in time. The other piece of data that completes the picture is the relative rates at which men and women message and respond to message. Men find the median women attractive, but shoot their shots with the women they find most attractive. Women rate few men as very attractive, but respond to more men who they rate as below-average. There is a kind of beautiful symmetry at work.
But you're misinterpreting the graph AGAIN, because it was based on how users rate profiles (with stars) which means they had the opportunity to read the profile.
Great post! There is a simple idea that sums all of this up quite nicely: it is easier for men to bring interlopers into a social circle than it is for women to do the same. So, it is the path of least resistance for women to date men who already have status within their social group.
We are a little hard-wired to view new men as a threat and new women as an opportunity. For example, there are a lot of countries where men can pass on citizenship to foreign-born wives, but women cannot.
Also, that OK Cupid data is revelatory. Could you imagine any internet/social media company publicly releasing that kind of data today? It really is an artifact of a specific moment in time. The other piece of data that completes the picture is the relative rates at which men and women message and respond to message. Men find the median women attractive, but shoot their shots with the women they find most attractive. Women rate few men as very attractive, but respond to more men who they rate as below-average. There is a kind of beautiful symmetry at work.
You state an important concept. We develop a story, even a novella about men we meet
OKCupid is so 2011. Women avoided 4- and 5-star ratings, because the software automatically notified the individual being rated.
"work on improving yourself." No. Many women date thugs, losers, and DMT users.
But you're misinterpreting the graph AGAIN, because it was based on how users rate profiles (with stars) which means they had the opportunity to read the profile.